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Self-compassion means being kind to yourself when things are difficult, knowing that everyone makes mistakes and has challenges, and being aware of your pain without letting it take over. Practicing self-compassion can help you handle stress relive, by fostering a supportive inner dialogue and turning it into opportunities for growth rather than sources of self-criticism
Neff & Davidson (2016) highlighted the importance of being kind to oneself, especially during difficult times, I was often been self-critical. I frequently told myself that I couldn’t achieve my goals and that success was impossible. This negative self-talk diminished my confidence and led me to view my efforts as failures before even trying. It created a cycle of negativity that was hard to break. Additionally, I was following what others were doing without taking a moment to talk to myself and understand my own desires. Over time, I realized that I was wrong, and what I need is to be proud of every decision I made. Embracing self-compassion and acknowledging that experience was a lesson, not a mistake.
As I learned more about self-compassion, I began to understand the power of treating myself with the same kindness and understanding that I would offer a friend. Instead of harsh criticism, I started to reassure myself that it was okay to struggle, as it were part of the journey. By talking to myself with compassion and encouraging myself to keep trying, I noticed an improvement and confidence. Telling myself that “everything will be fine” and urging myself to trust in my abilities helped me cultivate a more positive feedback. I now understand that having strong self-compassion means being proud of who I am and the decisions I make, seeing each moment as an opportunity for growth and learning.
References
Neff, K., & Davidson, O. (2016). Self-compassion: Embracing suffering with kindness. In Mindfulness in positive psychology (pp. 37-50). Routledge.
Robinson, K. J., Mayer, S., Allen, A. B., Terry, M., Chilton, A., & Leary, M. R. (2016). Resisting self-compassion: Why are some people opposed to being kind to themselves?. Self and Identity, 15(5), 505-524.
Your reflection on the importance of self-compassion truly resonated with me. I’ve also struggled with negative self-talk and a tendency to be overly self-critical, which often left me feeling drained and discouraged. However, your words have inspired me to reconsider how I approach my challenges and setbacks. I appreciate your honesty in sharing your journey towards embracing self-compassion and how it has positively impacted your mindset and well-being. It’s a reminder that we all deserve kindness and understanding, especially from ourselves. Thank you for this insightful post.
I was very touched to read your blog. I think you wrote very well about self-compassion. I feel bad for the pain you have gone through. I think we all go through some periods of self-struggle, but we all come out strong. In fact, we are rarely told to comfort our vulnerable feelings instead of suppressing them. As Neff and Davidson (2016) advocate, negative and positive emotions are normal emotions, and what we need to do is to acknowledge our weaknesses and change them. Mindfulness practice is beneficial, it helps us understand ourselves and cultivate confidence. I hope we will all get better. Well done.
Excellent discussion on how self-criticism can undermine one’s self-confidence. However, self-compassion can encourage one to keep trying in the face of adversity which increases confidence. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if this can be taught on an on-going basis in schools?